Today I Will Be Present

E shared this post written by Eliot Rausch last night over dinner. The words are simple, the concept even simpler, yet there I was.... feeling ever so guilty and ready to declare war on the speed our lives are moving. We always vow to do this more, don't we? It's like a New Year's resolution.  

Nothing like the impending countdown of bringing your first child into the world to make you start evaluating how you spend your time, how you're going to spend your time and where on earth has the time gone. Could swear I just got my braces off, passed my driving test and graduated from college. Most days I'm not convinced I'm old enough to be a 'mom'. Remember when thinking someone who was twenty-seven was so old? My college aged babysitters used to be so old to me. Now, I will be viewed as so old to an army of punk teenagers as I push a stroller through Brooklyn. 

A baby forces you to evaluate a lot of things. What... that world isn't going to be just all about you anymore? I know, hard one to swallow. Especially here in New York, our time is already so contested and fought for on all fronts and from all angles. Our implied busyness is a drug and we've lost the ability to just stand in line for an elevator without having to check our phones. I'm guilty of it. You're guilty of it. But habits are a funny thing like that. How do you make them stop? 

I remember when email became important and text messages were such an innovative step up from the voice mail, but when did they start to become the rulers of our attention? How about when we're at dinner and get a text message, we feel the need to respond so the person on the other end doesn't think we're rude for our lack of immediate response, but we're neglecting the other fully present person across the table from us. It's a text message, not an SOS. Our attention has just been divided. That's not multi-tasking.... that's just a bad habit we've all seemed to acquire. At large dinner parties I used to make guests drop off their phones in a basket to be left under a bench until they were on their way out the door. I have since ceased doing that as it started to make people have weird twitches. 

Maybe I'm secretly looking forward to this baby ruling our lives. So finally something with a bigger purpose than our own can be the focus of our days. That we don't have any other choice or desire but to be fully present. So yes, when you need an immediate response, you can call me as my hands will be full with a small human and piles of wet wipes. My hope is that this new chapter will be the catalyst for our habits to be reshaped, because honestly, I'm not sure we'd be able to do it on our own. 

How do you balance, break habits, fight to stay present? 

What We Wore :: Americana Dinner Style

 

Decided to throw a little wild card into today's outfit post. Welcome the first 'His & Her' addition. Probably not going to be a thing. It just worked out that we had these photos from our Americana dinner we hosted for Anthology Magazine. Wanted to share our outfits for the feature. 

WHAT WE WORE :: 

HIM

Shirt : J.Crew  // Pants : Zara  // Shoes : Kenneth Cole (similar)  // Hat : Brixton  // Jacket : John Varvatos

HER

Shirt : c/o 2020Ave // Pants : Target (similar #1, similar #2) // Shoes : Christian Louboutin // Shawl : Urban Outfitters (similar) // Necklace : DIY

In other news, I'm starting to get why there are 'mom clubs'. You can't really relate to the weird thing that is pregnancy unless you've experienced said weird things. If you think of the 'club' as one usually does a fraternity, then pregnancy is the equivalent to the freshman hazing stage. Embarrassing moments are bound to happen, but at least there are always others who are enduring this right of passage with you.. and when it's all over, you wear it like a badge of honor. Forever. And if you survive, you're in for life.... with the stretch marks as your unifying battle wounds. It's just really that 'if you survive' part. So far, I haven't read a book on anything pregnancy related and I've only devoured maternity style blogs and read all 300 whatever pages Lay Baby Lay. Obvious priorities. Other than that, I only know what my daily experiences have been. Every day comes with its own little bizarre quirks. After some back and forth on my 'anti-oversharing' policy.... I decided some events and occurrences just need to be immortalized. Let's start off with a few of the latest ones. 

:: CONFESSIONS ON PREGNANCY :: 

- If your biggest worries and anxiety come out when you're laying in bed at night, then apparently mine is the fear of outie belly buttons. I laid awake for an hour the other night in fear of what I'd do if the day came my stomach morphed from an innie to an outie. Some people don't mind the outie..... I'm not one of those people. 

- Just when you breathe a sigh of relief that a man on the subway has finally stood up to offer you a seat on a busy morning train, a slightly neurotic and unfriendly woman whom, upon quick examination either just ate a burrito for breakfast or is all of like a week pregnant, gets on the train and asks for your seat..... riiiight as you're about to sit down. Uh.... hum, what? Seriously? You even have a super 'attention I'm pregnant' outfit on. Your eyes skim the shocked faces of the other passengers and in your most graceful and dignified tone, you say.... 'of course!'. Then, you proceed to stand over the breakfast burrito eating maniac and passive aggressively display your bump right in front of her.... for the remainder of your commute. Yep, that just happened to me last Monday. Love you too New York. Love you too. 

- If you've gotten to the point in life where you just really loathe shaving your legs..... well, you should just get pregnant! Yep, it's that easy. And then around month three, your leg hair just miraculously ceases to exist. Thank the Lord! Leg shaving was never one of my strong suits, and thankfully I have super blonde hair, but when it did happen.... it was usually a super botched job. (I know, you're feeling sorry for E right about now.) 

- Need a fool proof excuse for everything? Pregnancy brain. Also see: foggytown. My type-a internal list making and memory keeping ability has slowly slipped out of my grasp over the weeks. Do I have my keys? No clue. Oh, you just told me something really important about your new job? Gonna need you to repeat that. You sent me three emails about grabbing coffee? Nope, never read them. Oh, I responded to them all? You don't say. Don't remember doing that. Needless to say, everything from my apartment to my iPhone to my work computer is covered in reminders and to-do lists. Most of which I forget to check. 

Photos :: Andrew Shepherd

Gather Round :: Anthology Magazine

When you're super talented chef/writer/foodie extraordinaire friend calls you up to ask if you want to combine forces for an epic dinner party to be featured in an epic publication..... well, in this particular case, not even a hurricane will stop you. 

I'm sure if you read this blog, you're familiar with my dear friend, Anna, of The Yellow Table. We share a deep love for a dinner table full of friends, stories, wine and good food. Anna also happens to be one heck of a writer and, last fall, asked if I wanted to partner with her on a feature piece for Anthology Magazine. Duh. She quickly whipped together an amazing menu, I gathered twigs (as I do), flowers, our friends and my great-grandmother's silver and we feasted. Oh, did we feast! Anna's recipes are insanely divine and you can find them all here. You're welcome.

The main focus of the story was that each person involved had a specific contribution included. Whether it was providing the decor, preparing the food, lending their design abilities, or being on hand for a little musical performance..... this dinner was the product of a whole team. Then we combined forces to prepare, shoot and eat..... all on the eve of Hurricane Sandy. No big deal. (The weather channel was on mute in the background all night!) 

I've been a long-time reader of Anthology Magazine and was honored to be asked to contribute. The quarterly magazine focuses each issue on a centralized theme and continually captures stunning interiors, design, entertaining and culture.  If you aren't familiar with the publication, check out more here. Print copies are available at most Anthropologie stores (also in their online store here) and local businesses in your area, but the best route is to order your own copy via the website. Feel free to watch the trailer for our current issue and get a glossy copy for yourself to see the full story, photos and recipes! 

The Line-Up :: 

Anna Watson Carl - Cook and all around food magician. 

Brandon Carl - Most likely to take over the world one day with his brilliant ideas and tech innovations.

Dana Tanamachi - Brilliant chalk/lettering artist.

Kirby Lee - Music business powerhouse. 

Bobby Long - Ubber talented musician (new album just out on Feb 19th.... shameless plug!).

Eric Ryan Anderson - My better half. Photog and video man. 

Andrew Shepherd - Assistant photog man. 

And me! 

Photos by Eric Ryan Anderson and Andrew Shepherd for Anthology Magazine. 

Baby Mama Essentials :: First Trimester

In recent weeks, I've had to learn to be more confident answering the 'how have you been feeling' questions with the honest response. That answer is 'freaking amazing'! Somewhere along the way, I got the idea that I didn't want to mislead other gals or have them think pregnancy is a walk in the park, cause it's not, so I would give the luke warm answer of 'oh, you know how the first months are'..... when that hasn't actually been the truth. I was suffering from guilt. I've honestly felt the same as I did before I was pregnant. Just add a belly bump that sometimes simply resembles a food baby more than an actual pregnant stomach.... and my ability to fall into a narcoleptic sleep at 7pm sharp. I need to not feel guilty about how easy these months have been, mostly because I want to be fully present for every moment. There is only one first-time around at this.... and I realize pregnancy is not easy for some women.... but I've been overwhelmingly thankful that it has been such a smooth ride for me.... so far. I say this all because I'm dry humored by nature (news flash), but that doesn't mean I take this experience for granted. 

Sappy stuff aside, I wanted to share my go-to products from the past five months. And really, why are these months referred to as 'trimesters'.... they should just be called 'stages of survivial'. Your body is changing, your daily hypoglycemic rants are at an all time high and I've memorized the number of steps it takes me to get from my desk to the bathroom. 

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MY BABY MAMA ESSENTIALS :: 

one // KIND bars - The perfect cure to the snack attacks that hit nearly every three hours. Simple ingredients, simple packaging and tasty as can be. 

two // Vitamins - Why wasn't I taking these even before I was pregnant? Who knew they basically transformed your hair into the mane of a goddess and gave you nails of steel? I'm kind of expecting them to turn me into Beyonce.

three // Uniqlo Jeggings - Now, stop right there. I know the word 'jeggings' invokes a lot of mixed feelings in people. The word usually makes me cringe. Frankly, it's just a poor choice in product naming if you ask me. But.... I have been able to dodge the maternity jeans thus far thanks to these stretchy fellas. High five! 

four // Snuggle Body Pillow - Yep, that's right. One person classified it as 'the Cadillac of body pillows' and I was SOLD. That.... and one look at how comfy that pregnant lady in the advertising photo looks and I couldn't wait to spoon up to my very own Snuggle. One effect pregnancy has had on me is the discomfort of sleeping. Your body is achy and all you desire is hours of uninterrupted sleep. Especially since those precious hours disappear once the baby is born. (Disclaimer :: your husband may get jealous of the Snuggle, cause let's face it, it's just a body pillow on steroids.) 

five // Chimes Ginger Chews - Aside from a maniac taxi ride one evening, I haven't really experienced any nausea during these months. I did however, have a few encounters with the common acid reflex that occurs during pregnancy. Ginger is a pretty big natural cure-all for a lot of ailments, and this is no exception. I keep a stash on my bedside table. Plus, they're just kindof yummy regardless. 

six // Unsweetened Almond Milk - Almonds are packed full of iron, calcium and protein. All good things your body needs during these months. I've been a fan of this box of deliciousness for a while, but had only used it when making fresh juices. Now a days, I'll just chug it straight from the container while standing with the fridge door wide open. No shame. 

seven // Orbit Fruity Gum - If there's ever been something I've been known to get die hard about, it has always been my choice of gum. For years, I've been a loyal Trident 'Minty Sweet Twist' chewer and never cheated on it. One of my only food aversions has been to this gum. Gasp! It was a sad day when that was realized. 

eight // Cycling - Believe the hype. Not only is it great for your general fitness routine, it's the perfect form of low impact cardio during pregnancy and will assist in keeping your energy levels high. With the help of my co-worker and trainer, we've got a kick butt fitness routine down to keep all my body curves where they should be during and after this pregnancy. Don't want things moving south anytime soon. 

nine // Straight Up H20 - It would do some good to just hook a sister up to a good old-fashioned IV. You would think I wandered the Saharan desert every day for hours. I just can't seem to quench my thirst, ever. Around my desk, at home and in every purse I own.... you'll find massive liter sized water bottles scattered. 

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We can end with an awesome action shot of me enjoying the most delicious Vietnamese sandwich. After which, I felt Baby A move for the first time while riding the F train. Took a few hours to decide if it was, in fact, the baby or the sandwiches. But, we concluded it was the baby. 

 

Alt Summit :: 2013 Recap

Another Alt Summit has come and gone. Another whirlwind of parties, dinners and panels. I met new friends and reconnected with old ones. The baby bump got a lot of love and I survived my panel presentation. At every Alt Summit I attend, I'm constantly in awe of the hard work that goes on behind the scenes to put on an event of its scale. Three cheers all around! 

I wanted to share a few sporadic images of my days in Salt Lake. There is no rhyme or reason.... these were just my favorites. Last year, I lugged around my Fuji Instax and snapped pictures of new friends..... this year, I could barely remember to stop running around and eat lunch. Even though it's a conference full of hundreds of bloggers, I found it difficult to always be taking out my camera to snap pictures. I realized these were the times where our online relationships get to take on real life perspective and I found myself ignoring the need to Instagram, tweet, snap pictures of my food or ask others to take photos of me and (fill in the blank). Instead, it was refreshing to get to know more about the people whose online businesses and blogs I truly admire. That was my focus. Although, there was the time I chatted with Jessica Alba about her amazing brand, The Honest Company, and she shared some truths on being a new mom. Now, that.... I stopped to take a picture of. You can bet you'll be seeing a lot more of their products on the blog as we start prepping for Bebe A. 

If you missed our panel on 'Advanced Blogging Skills', be sure to check out Whitney's post here that includes an overview complete with pretty photos. Who doesn't love pretty pictures?! Also, there's some stellar recaps here and here. Enjoy!